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11-10-2014 03:49 PM
11-10-2014 03:49 PM
Re: New diagnosis
My friend was in a situation like this. It was very painful and as all we carers know, shameful inside us. Can you speak to him in a secure meeting with the councillor about going to the bank to make you a co signer?
I must re read all the messages on this one.
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11-10-2014 06:20 PM
11-10-2014 06:20 PM
Re: New diagnosis
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11-10-2014 08:23 PM
11-10-2014 08:23 PM
Re: New diagnosis
If he is not working with any clinical supports or community supports would he listen to his mum or dad or sister or brother or best friend?
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11-10-2014 09:07 PM
11-10-2014 09:07 PM
Re: New diagnosis
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11-10-2014 09:12 PM
11-10-2014 09:12 PM
Re: New diagnosis
Have you rung any of the utility companies or banks as maybe it would be timely to ask for extension of due dates?
Hang in there..I would be stressed to the Max in same situation..
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11-10-2014 09:42 PM
11-10-2014 09:42 PM
Re: New diagnosis
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12-10-2014 12:31 PM
12-10-2014 12:31 PM
Re: New diagnosis
Hang in there Mrs C.
I found that dealing with the highs was harder to deal with than the lows, and it also caused more damage. My husband lost his license and got kicked out of Church!! I can look back now and laugh but it was hard at the time and I dont think I have ever forgiven him fully
If at all possible, leave your emotions out of it and try to work out what is best for YOU!! I wish I knew now what I knew 10 years ago, things would be very different today
take care and good luck
ZZ
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13-10-2014 03:43 PM
13-10-2014 03:43 PM
Re: New diagnosis
Good advice about trying to leave emotion out of decisions. ❤️
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15-10-2014 10:10 AM
15-10-2014 10:10 AM
Re: New diagnosis
I have no more money until a cheque comes in or end of the month.
I have fully redrawn the mortgage.
There is nothing I can do to help .
I earn 11% of what he earns. My stress levels are up today, might go & walk around the block.
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15-10-2014 08:22 PM
15-10-2014 08:22 PM
Re: New diagnosis
Oh God Mrs C - I feel for you
Is he only talking via email now? That must be painful
My best suggestion is to be open and honest with people especially family - pride doesnt pay the bills Im sorry. That will be the hardest part. If he says, why did you tell everyone, say I had no choice, you wouldnt talk
other suggestions
1. explain to the bank and say you are separated with hope of reconciliation and say everything to do with the mortgage must be done with double signatures
2. send him an email by return saying "I have spoken to Centrelink, who have advised me to talk to the bank, who have advised me to take legal action to protect myself" - doesnt matter if its not true - let him know you are serious and wont be pushed around.
3. Put YOUR needs FIRST
4. If he is having an episode, this might be the first of many, and if he wants to control the money, and you at the same time, then you will have to put something in place
take care
zz