Lived Experience Forum

[BlueBay]

Very brave to share this @Razzle 

Hugs and love ❤️❤️

[Razzle]

Thanks @BlueBay , you know just as well as I do with how we’re feeling.  Thankyou for being such a great support my friend ❤️❤️

[Former-Member]

Hi @BlueKnot 

Thank you for your reply and I really appreciate your services, but what more can be done for the issues I raised. I know Blueknot is a small service, but I'm also asking @Lauz and other organisation who promise change, want to reduce stigma, suicide... What can we all do to make a change? For example I mentioned some of the things I see missing:

• Clinics with targeted programs for complex PTSD/trauma. A place where we can learn grounding techniques, creating safe places, learning about the effects - like in the Blueknot Survivor workshop, learn about trauma sensitive yoga, art etc.
• Having complex PTSD/trauma included in dsm-5 with corrections to the current
• Support groups for survivors
• Mandatory training for health and emergency personnel for trauma informed care
• Reducing the stigma of complex PTSD/trauma - if you ask on the street, who would actually knos what that is, if they have not been affected?

Thank you so much for your continued support!

[BlueKnot]

Hello @Razzle 

I am so sorry that you had to experience such terror as a child. It often takes people over 20 years to disclose childhood sexual abuse so you aren’t alone in holding the secret for so long. It takes great bravery to tell someone. Well done in sharing that burden with people you trust.

many people go to the police with historical abuse situations. Did these events happen in the community or was it part of an school, church etc? I only ask that because there are other avenues for support if it happened in an institution.

ifyou decide to go to the police, maybe you can ask at the local station to speak to someone who understands historical childhood abuse, or even a female officer if that helps.

If you would like to talk to our counsellor about that process and how you might approach it with as much safety for yourself, please feel free to contact us on 1300 657 380.

Congratulations on the steps you’ve taken already in healing from this.

[BlueKnot]

Hi @Former-Member 

Thank you for your thoughtful reflections on the issues we face as a sector in creating awareness around complex childhood trauma, the sorts of programs and services that are needed and the work we have ahead of us. The Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse did some great work in raising the issue of the impacts of complex childhood trauma and made some great recommendations about systemic change. You can read Some of these recommendations via www.childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au. The final report has a volume on support and treatment that gives some good recommendations about sectoral change.

there is a growing group of advocates, including Blue Knot Foundation who advice and lobby government around the needs of survivors. Unfortunately it does take time for changes to happen but I can say that since the Royal Commission we have seen an increase in awareness around trauma informed practice. In fact BKF provide training around this to government departments, organisations and individuals around Australia.

a strong voice in lobbying and raising the issues of survivors continues to grow and I have great hope that especially in the helping professions people are learning more about how to be trauma informed.

the next step really is to build a solid network of trauma informed services to support survivors across their lifespan.

At BKF we have a date base of trauma informed health professionals, we also ru. Some survivor workshops to assist with understanding how trauma impacts us and there are some trauma informed support groups across Australia (although not nearly enough).

So in summary, we are with you in your vision and are doing all we can to improve the sector.

thanks again for your reflections and raising this important topic

[Razzle]

@BlueKnot   All of the events happened in the community, not in an institution.

Just reading your sentence about asking someone at the local police station has my heart literally exploding out of my chest.  I’m so fearful of doing that, and I think it’s for 2 reasons.  The first is that I don’t know what to expect, I don’t know what will happen and how much control I’ll have over the whole thing.  I know that I would never be able to come face to face with these people, that thought terrifies me.  As it is, the old man has since died so nothing can happen their anyway.  The rest of the people are known to my family and I’m scared of what can happen if my family ever found out.

The 2nd reason being (which I know is totally irrational) is that I’m scared of the threat that was made to keep my mouth shut in the first place.  I now know that those threats won’t be carried out, but it’s still very much at the front of my mind and fills me with so much anxiety that the thought prevents me from speaking up.  I know I already have with my councillor - but that’s as far as the information goes, it stops at

him.  

Im from a small rural town where everyone knows everyone, as it is I see a councellor 270kms from home so that no one there knows who I am, speaking to anyone local - police included just makes me feel even more vulnerable, fearful that all of this will get back to my family.

[BlueBay]

Hi @Razzle @Lauz @BlueKnot 

I did go to the police station (child sexual abuse dept) snd the detective explained everything from making a statement to going to court. He explained that because my abuse is historical I would have to remember a lot in detail. 

I cant go through with it. It would hurt me even further. 

And he explained that it is very traumatic for me. 

[BlueKnot]

Hi @Razzle 

it’s such an important thing for you to do - make your own decisions about these things. Everyone is different and we always advocate for people to make conscious decisions based on what’s best for them. It sounds like you have done that and the police did a good job of explaining the process to you. You got your power back in deciding how to proceed. Its certainly a very difficult process and hard decision to make and a decision many people make in the end as the process can be very traumatising.

[BlueKnot]

Hi @Razzle 

What your explaining here is such a real challenge. its always completely your decision. You know your circumstances better than anyone and we encourage you to put your safety and needs at the forefront always. 

thanks you for sharing the very real challenges so eloquently.

Should you ever want to talk this through with trauma informed counsellors anonymously, you are welcome to call the  Blue Knot Helpline, we are open every day 9-5.

[Razzle]

@BlueKnot  Thankyou for your reply, I have a lot to think about.  I don’t think I’m ready to speak to the police just yet, this conversation alone has made me feel anxious, I really doubt I could walk into a police station and keep it together .

@BlueBay   I can only imagine what it must have been like to speak to the police, you are very brave to do that.  Right now I don’t share that bravery, which also frustrates me.  I have a real sense of injustice at the moment, and have had for a few months now, but I just can’t seem to bring myself to do anything about it.