Lived Experience Forum

[Dani_Murray]

Hi Jojo 7,
I do not know the answer to your question of whether your daughter would be taken from you if you had a complete breakdown. I do, however, know the answer to another question, if you don't take good care of your own health and make wise choices, your daughter won't have a mother. Hope things are going a little better for you today. As the Forum team wrote, take it minute by minute, hour by hour, to get through this difficult time. Wishing you a full recovery from this illness and any addictions. There are people in your corner, cheering for you.

[Appleblossom]

@Serenity1 

I hope you managed some way to get through today.

I am really sorry that things have accumulated to this level and that mental health services were withdrawn.  I am not sure what the result of seeking help will be, but the system should be able to cope with giving you respite and support rather than taking your child away completely.   I have felt in similar situations like you as a mother.  I had no substance use issues at the time but found it extremely difficult to get help, and felt rudely put down when counsellors say there is lots of help available.  

[Serenity1]

@Dani_Murray thankyou! - I don't have any substance abuse issues, I have been sober (alcohol) for two years & don't even smoke cigarettes- definitely don't do hard drugs- the doctor said the strange reaction& tingling in my body, particularly my hands & face was from severe hyperventilating & panic / shock - but I can see how it came across as I was using- that is definitely not the case --I thought I was making good decisions that's why I reacted so strongly-when I figured out I might not have by complete accident- Thankyou for your support!

[Serenity1]

Thankyou @Appleblossom I completely agree 💯 I got through today- just! I don't have any substance issues either- just worried if I have a complete mental breakdown- do they take ur child? Yeah it's so hard to find help-what a joke! Thanks for your support 💖

[Dani_Murray]

Thanks for letting me know how you got on today with the doctor's consultation.  I am so glad to learn that you are clear of addictions and don't even smoke cigarettes.  It is clearly the case that you have been making some very wise and good decisions.   Wish I could say the same about my son who has bi polar disorder....he has experienced panic attacks in the past so I know that they are extremely unpleasant and with physical symptoms that vary from person to person.  I hope things continue to improve in your health and your family.  

[Appleblossom]

@Serenity1 

Glad you survived.  Sometimes that is all I have managed to do.

Being a single mum is a tough gig and it is well known that it takes more than one person to raise a child.

Did your doctor manage to do anything for you? 

Perhaps if he cannot organise referrals then he is not the right doctor for you? Possible a female doctor, although as you discovered with your mia support person, getting good support is about more than simply b eing the same gender.  I believe you and your mini family deserve support.

Good Luck

[Serenity1]

@Appleblossom Thankyou!- yes being a single mum is hard- I agree it takes more than one person to raise a child 💯 ( I struggle with guilt because of this)
The doctor wasn't much help-(it was a lady)- I felt she was overwhelming me by talking about a lot of other issues that were not important- I don't really know what I expected- I felt a bit let down to be honest-
She mentioned at least three times I should go see the doctor I used to see, before I saw her,(a doctor I was not happy with) this was only my second time seeing her-& the last time I saw her she kept mentioning I should go back to see the other doctor also- which made me feel as if SHE didn't want to see me as a patient- the first appointment I had with her she was so caring & supportive- this was immediately after the hospital told me they would not be giving me support & I had a little break down in her office- but this time I didn't feel as though she was as caring or gentle & I was in a waaaaay worse state- she just keeps telling me to go to the other doctor- making me feel dismissed & like She didn't want to deal with my breakdown mess- so I'm not feeling very supported, wanted - just feel like nobody wants to help me or deal with me because I'm too far gone-
Oh u remembered about the MiA support worker- that's very nice of you-
Thanks for your kindness 💖

[Appleblossom]

I have found that hospitals are not equipped to refer people with mental health issues.  I cannot believe how incompetent the management of my son and I has been.   It has taken serious determined research and follow through from me.  

It has taken me a long time to develop medical and psychosocial and psychiatric support.  A lot of time.  The lady today made her position clear. Dont go back. Keep looking til you find someone who will take you on.  Some aspects of doctoring are about being caring, but there are varied bed side manners. Other aspects like knowing their stuff and being thorough are important.  I have forwarded all my prior medical records to my current doctors so that they are fully informed.

[Eden1919]

@Serenity1  i am sorry you are having such a hard time at the moment, i am not sure if you have tried this before and it sounds completely stupid but it can sometimes help when panicked. but if you get some super cold water like icy in a bucket or even in the sink and either stick your face in it for a few seconds like 10-15 or get a cloth and stick that in the water then on your face primarily around your eyes it is supposed to trigger something called the dive response which is supposed to like kick you out of the panic and slow things down. i dont know if it will work for you or not but i do personally find cold helps me when i am panicked to at least get back to being able to think a bit better. 

how are you feeling now? and sorry the doctor was no help. 

[Serenity1]

@Eden1919 Thankyou I have never heard of this so will have to give it a try! I have had heightened levels of anxiety all week, can't eat, can't sleep, can't stop crying- catastrophising - predicting the outcome which is baaaaaaaaaaaaaddddd!!!
Can't snap myself out of it- today I crashed -(because appointment that might shed light got cancelled)-& now feel numb & exhausted- which is actually a nice change from constant panic & worry & stress! Wish I could feel numb more often actually this is new & much more pleasant than horrible anxiety that doesn't go away - thankyou 💖