Lived Experience Forum

[Angels333]

Thanks @MDT  and Wow! @Zoe7  you always respond with so much clarity, you're right, I shouldn't let it define me.   I do have my course and that brings hope.   I am tired of my MI  all the past traumas that I just dream I could be someone else for awhile, then I wouldn't have Mr Angels or my 3 adult kids...   I wouldn't have you and so many others on the forum.     I think stopping DBT has left a hole and I'm struggling with what to fill it with...   journalling I don't know...

I hope your day is kind to you  @Zoe7 

❤🧡💛💚💙💜

XOXO ANGELS333 

[Zoe7]

You could make yourself a DBT timetable to continue each week working through those skills @Angels333 Set aside an hour or two a week where you go over what you have learnt - it then becomes a kind of 'weening' off the formalities of the sessions but you keep your hand on the skills regularly.

We never truly 'get over' the past traumas or what we have been through Hon but we do find ways to deal with it - and that you are doing. You are so right with your H and kids - you have built a life regardless of what you have been through and that is both exceptional and needs to be acknowledged. This MH 'journey' will always have it's 'down' days but it is the 'up' days that we need to hold onto and move forward with. You get extremely anxious with the thought of work but you ALWAYS get through it - and that takes great strength. This course also gives you hope (as well as the occasional anxious moment or moments of doubt) - but again ...you are doing it and that is also admirable. The result will be a better place for you to be in terms of employment opportunities and that can only be a good thing. Keep doing what you are doing Hon - because it IS working and I for one am suer proud of how much you are doing, pushing yourself and moving forward in such a positive way 

[Angels333]

Thanks @Zoe7  I was doing the diary cards over Christmas but I stopped about a week ago.    I was supposed to go to QLD to visit family up there and then head to country NSW to visit Mr A's family so I hadn't booked a psychologist appointment as I was supposed to be away.   My Psychologist is booked 6 months in advance so I stick to 3 weekly appointments  and book early so there's no option for a January appt.    If thoughts get too bad I could see my gp he's a week ahead for appointments also so for spur of the moment stuff/ impulsive things I do have to just work through my skills.   I'm at the start of a novel right now,  I'm enjoying it already, particularly as we just put in our AC unit (it's 36 degrees today) and drinking ice lemonade with a coffee every hour or so...  what do have to be stressed about right now is a mystery, I just need to take life head on and live it!!!

Are you relaxing with your holiday @Zoe7 

[Zoe7]

Hey @Angels333 You are taking life head on and living it Hon 👍 Having to cancel your trips is a pain and of course would be disappointing but you are filling your time with other things and that is important. Sometimes just Being is all we need to do and in-fact it is a great skill to learn - we don't need to always be doing something (which I do see is a dichotomy coming from me lol) but today I have put everything on hold to recoup some energy. I have slept most of the day but still feel tired and not at all well so will continue to rest the remainder of the day. I have had Toby snuggles too which have made my day - it really is the little things that make it all worthwhile - find those in your day, acknowledge them and hold onto them ...reading your book is just one of those things to hold onto because you are enjoying it.

I am slowly getting things done I want to these holidays with plenty of rest in between. There are some things I cannot do until next week (no money until then) but not stressing about it - it is what it is and will all get done eventually. I have got my garage pretty much sorted which makes it easier to find things so that is a massive bonus. I still have to make a workbench but for now I am using an old desk and that is working fine. Still a fair bit of gardening to do also but that takes energy I do not have right now - again - it will get done just not straight away. Next week I need to start looking at the planning for this year too and whilst I will need some brain power to do that it should also be fun working out what I am going to teach each grade for Art - once I have a plan in place it will make it easier when I do go back and give me more time when I get home to do things so it all works together. One step at a time though for now - and my priority today is resting.

[Angels333]

@Zoe7  Hi, I am glad your resting today, sorry you feel under the whether!

As for art planning it is super exciting!   I remember doing linographs at school, I loved it so much.   I used to really look forward to art usually 1 afternoon a week, I had such a traumatic childhood, but I was always happy for art days, I could take a breath and be myself!

[Zoe7]

Our kids love Art too @Angels333 They all look forward to the lessons each week and I love their enthusiasm and engagement in each lesson - it gives me a sense of achievement as well knowing what I am teaching them is making a difference. It is lovely teaching the whole school as well. I have prep to grade 6 and each class last year were gorgeous so I do not expect that will change this year. The mix of kids will be different but I will have taught all but the preps so I will know most of them (not by name 'cos there are over 400 kids) but by face and ability - still learning all their names 

Art has that wonderful ability to include everyone because nothing is wrong - just different ...and if the kids go in a different direction than what the lesson planned entailed then I run with it - after all it is their own imagination and capabilities that need to be fostered and that is something I love doing.

[Angels333]

@Zoe7 beautiful 

[greenpea]

@Angels333  Am here for you Angels333. Never far away. Love peax

[Angels333]

Thanks pea💚

@greenpea   I know how you are atm and I'm thinking about you hoping you're doing okay xx

[greenpea]

@Angels333 xx