Lived Experience Forum

[frog]

Hi @Pitz Welcome. I have Bipolar 1 too. I am nearly 4 years post diagnosis, but I remember all too well how messed up things got before I was diagnosed. I ended up in hospital and agree that psychosis is terrifying. From where I sit you are doing pretty well. It is very difficult to accept the diagnosis, and you have taken big steps in terms of getting help. It took me a year to really accept it. I think my psychiatrist was getting a bit exasperated! I'm so glad you've found a good psychologist - they're priceless.

Just last month my pdoc (internet short hand for psychiatrist) said that I'm stable. This doesn't mean trouble free, but the waves tend to be more manageable, and I've come to recognise triggers and signs of trouble. Medication has played a big role in that. I didn't want to take the heavy duty drugs (I did because I was scared of ending up back in hospital), but in the second year post hospital we found the right mix.

There are also a lot of lifestyle things you can do. Things that are important for general health can be critical for people with Bipolar.

Sleep, for example, is even more important for people with bipolar than it is for the population at large. I try to stick to a routine, and my pdoc has said if I go 2 days without decent sleep I need a reset, which sometimes means a day off work and often means taking medication for a few days to get back into a good pattern.

Exercise is another big one. There's lots of evidence that it helps. I also meditate, though it took me a long time to get into the habit and it's not for everyone.

Work. Big issue. I am lucky to have a supportive workplace. I had a graduated return to work and now work 34 hours a week. I'm aiming at full time, but I'm a lone parent of two older kids (15 and 21) who still live with me and they are still pretty demanding!

I have had to disclose to some key people in my workplace because a) I was in hospital and after that couldn't do a lot of hours initially, partly due to adjusting to the medication and partly due to inability to concentrate b) I have had a couple of episodes since (nothing like the big one), which meant a few weeks off to recover and regain balance. My advice re telling people you have Bipolar is initially only on a 'need to know' basis. I wouldn't come straight out with it in interviews. 

If you're anything like me, you are probably still reeling from your recent experience. I am also a planner and having to take a day by day approach for a while was very very hard. Further down the road, I can see that the diagnosis was a new beginning for me. Yes, it was devastating, but in some ways it was a relief, because I'd been misdiagnosed for a long time, and at least I know now what I'm dealing with.

Also, you are young (you may not feel it right now) and you have time to work through this. I actually wish that I'd know what I do now a few decades earlier. On a positive note, the forum has been wonderful for me. The sort of stuff you're going through is almost impossible to convey to people who haven't experienced it. There are so may people here who just get it.

I may have rambled on to long. I wish you all the best.