EMdr

[buzzer32]

So it’s often suggested EMDR is great for those with trauma. Have tried it over a prolong period and found it made things worse or next to useless.

It didn’t really change by distress from trauma
It didn’t really change by beliefs but psychologist sugggest it should and example give was despite on going family violence i should think to myself i am safe. Dunno how thinking you are safe if still experincing ongoing family violence is a good idea?

[tyme]

Hey @buzzer32 ,

I'm sorry to hear you did not find EMDR helpful. I'm wondering whether you were really ready for the therapy considering your current challenges. 

I'm saying the above based on my own experiences. Early on, I attempted therapy, but I didn't get anywhere - I don't think I was really ready. However, years on, when I attempted therapy again, it made a huge difference - this time, I was ready.

Do you have supports around you? If you feel you need to speak to someone, we encourage you to speak to 1800RESPECT.

[buzzer32]

It was highly recommend i do it, many mental health expert said make me stress free even with ongoing family violence.

As for 1800 respect, id never try them again after told me as man i just need man up.

[tyme]

I'm so sorry to hear that @buzzer32 . Do you think it was the right time to do it? 

I know you mentioned there is ongoing family violence. Are you safe for now? It's important that if you feel unsafe, to contact 000.

As for 1800RESPECT, I somehow highly doubt you will get the same person on the other side of the phone again. Perhaps it's worth trying again? - No pressure of course.

I'm here if you need a chat.

[buzzer32]

Hello Ive had that sort of response most times from 1800 respect


As for for the right time, well given if you suggest right time is when 100% safe and no FV, well thats going be years as there very complex family violence issues

[whalewatcher]

I totally agree. I didn't find it helped at all and in some ways more traumatising. I do think it is strange how we have to ingrain that we are safe now when there are so many factors that make that untrue, particularly with you still being in an unsafe situation, thats really hard, would make it near impossible to process anything. I find with CPTSD as well, the trauma feels very alive internally and so the body doesn't feel safe is always looking out for threat, even if there isn't one. I found IFS (Internal Family Systems) to be a much more gentle and supportive therapy.

[tyme]

I'm hearing you @whalewatcher . I don't know anything about it, but I can see how it might be lightened to:

It's cold and raining, but you keep being told it's not??? Is it a bit like that? That is, you are told you are safe when you know you are not?

I'm still questioning the timing of it all. To be in the midst of violence and be told you are okay and safe sounds quite confounding to me @whalewatcher @buzzer32 .

I'm sorry you have felt a similar way. I'm glad to hear what has worked for you though @whalewatcher 

[whalewatcher]

Hi, Yeh it just feels a bit false. I find my internal world is full of terror and a part of me absolutely does not feels safe or wants to relax.

IFS hasn't really helped me yet, I haven't done enough, but having tried many types of therapy and modalities I can see how powerful yet effective it can be. I would need a lot more sessions and I only get 10 with my mental health care plan which makes it hard to get the amount of help needed. I do have an amazing therapist who I like which is a miracle, but I am not feeling good in life. And now I have to fish around for other free therapists, like through sane, who likely don't do IFS, but I need to be seeing someone when my session run out which is soon.

[tyme]

Have you checked if you are eligible for SANE's Guided Service? @whalewatcher 

[whalewatcher]

Yes I believe I am, I applied today